Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson (Sherlock)
Sherlock Holmes: It’s obvious, isn’t it?
John Watson: It’s not obvious to me.
Sherlock Holmes: Dear God. What is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so boring.
Sherlock Holmes: [about the murder victim] Her coat is slightly damp; she's been in heavy rain in the last few hours. No rain anywhere in London in that time. Under her coat collar is damp too; she's turned it up against the wind. She's got an umbrella in her left-hand pocket, but it's dry and unused: not just wind, strong wind, too strong to use her umbrella. We know from her suitcase that she was intending to stay overnight, so she must have come a decent distance, but she can't have traveled more than two or three hours because her coat still hasn't dried. So, where has there been heavy rain and strong wind within the radius of that travel time? Cardiff.
Dr John Watson: That's fantastic!
Sherlock Holmes: Do you know you do that out loud?
Dr John Watson: Sorry. I'll shut up.
Sherlock Holmes: No, it's... fine.
Sherlock Holmes: Did he offer you money to spy on me...?
John Watson: Yes.
Sherlock Holmes: Did you take it?
John Watson: ...No.
Sherlock Holmes: Pity, we could've split the fee. Think it through next time.
John Watson: There are lives at stake, Sherlock! Actual human live— Just, just so I know, do you care about that at all?
Sherlock Holmes: Will caring about them help save them?
John Watson: [angrily] Nope!
Sherlock Holmes: Then I'll continue not to make that mistake.
John Watson: And you find that easy, do you?
Sherlock Holmes: Yes, very. Is that news to you?
John Watson: No. [pause] No.
Sherlock Holmes: [realising] ...I've disappointed you.
John Watson: [sarcastically] That's good, that's good deduction, yeah.
Sherlock Holmes: Don't make people into heroes, John. Heroes don't exist, and if they did, I wouldn't be one of them.
Sherlock Holmes: [talking to John on the phone while on the roof of St. Barts] I'm a fake.
John Watson: Sherlock...
Sherlock Holmes: The newspapers were right all along. I want you to tell Lestrade, I want you to tell Mrs. Hudson and Molly, in fact tell anyone who will listen to you... that I created Moriarty for my own purposes.
John Watson: Ok, shut up Sherlock. Shut up. The first time we met - the first time we met, you knew all about my sister, right?
Sherlock Holmes: Nobody could be that clever.
John Watson: You could.